Everything Feels Hard

I was talking to an Early Childhood educator recently and they were sharing about how challenging things were at work. They are short-staffed, people would interview for a position, get all the way through to the orientation and then just not show up. They were also talking about how difficult things were in their personal life. They said, “everything feels so hard right now.”

I’ve often said that life is only allowed to be hard in one area at a time, either personal or professional but not both simultaneously. As I was consulting with this educator, we talked about all the various tasks facing them. It felt daunting and overwhelming so much so that they didn’t want to do any of them and just put their head in the sand hoping they would go away or handle themselves. We talked about the reality of that actually occurring. In fact, sometimes when we ignore things they only get bigger or worse. I realize my saying this can sound contradictory to what I usually “preach” which is the “W” in SLOW (to wait and watch). In my defense, there are occasions when waiting and watching is the best approach. There are absolutely times when we don’t need to insert ourselves into a situation and allow others to get involved. However, in this particular case, there were things that only this educator can attend to and they were just overwhelmed and avoiding. In that situation, action is needed.

Just like we tell our students when things feel unmanageable, we advise them to break it down into smaller steps. So that’s what I suggested to this person. Just do one small task at a time. What can you accomplish by the end of this week? Do that one thing and feel good about your progress. Life is already hard enough; we don’t need to make it harder.

There is so much stress in this field, our brains are often at capacity thinking about everything. So why make it harder for ourselves than necessary? Are there ways to simplify our to do’s? Can good enough be good enough? Can we break it down into bite size pieces?

In preparing for an upcoming presentation, I felt a desire to add in extra activities and resources for the audience. But my colleagues and I had to consider the time allotted for the session and how much our participants could really process in that amount of time. It was a good reminder that sometimes less is more and to not add to our plates and then subsequently our audience.

The same is true for something taking place in my extended family. I want to get involved and (in my humble opinion) improve the situation but no one is asking me to do that and it’s not even my responsibility. It’s just another opportunity to practice slowing down and realizing I have enough to do. There is no need to overextend myself or my energy. I can just simply focus on the fullness of my life. (*note; IF I was invited to get involved, I would then have a decision to make: if I did involve myself, what would I have to remove or sacrifice. Those should always be conscious intentional decisions).

What does this mean for you? Are there ways you are overcomplicating your life? Adding in extra? Making things harder for yourself than needed? How can you simplify and set boundaries? When is enough, enough and when can good enough be good enough? Let this be your reminder to slow down, take inventory and prioritize your own needs and well-being one small step at a time.